Total Hetalia Wipeout
by Little Miss Magic Trio
Summary: England is so bored with life that he signs himself and 19 other countries up for Total Wipeout. What could this lead too. I know this summary sucks. If you want to see some total and utter weirdness, this is the place. Enjoy.
1. Chapter 1

This is going to be epic. Be prepared for Germany, Richard Hammond and Big Red Balls all in the same story. Grab some popcorn people, we are going for a ride.

Chapter 1

England found his life depressingly boring. He had been on this earth longer than he cared to admit and guess what. Every moment of his miserable life was deja vu. He needed something different. He needed insanity ans sanity in one whle day. He needed something that would pack a punch. He needed Total Wipeout. And that is why this meeting is being held.

"So, you want some of us to come with you on a British TV show which is potentially dangerous?" Germany said, raising an eyebrow. England shook his head. "I just need 19 of you. Preferab,y one from each country so that means only one Italy. Dont worry. There are a lot of safety precautions set up, so it s not dangerous at all. Unless you cant swim, but I think we can all swim." The countries murmed in agreement.

"So, whos up for It."

In about 20 minutes 19 nations had volunteered. The list was as such:

England

America

Italy

Germany

Japan

China

Russia

Canada

Denmark

Finland

Estonia

Poland

Lithuania

France

Sweden

Norway

Iceland

Austria

Hungary

Prussia

Half of these people didnt want to come but were forced too. Prussia was a last resort because nobody else would come. England is going to use the east and west Germany thing to pull it off.

"Ahhh. This is going to be classic." England murmered to himself as he started typing an Email.

_Richard Hammond_

_I have an idea for a one off Total Wipout episode which will bring down the house._

_I have many friends around the world and 20 of them from different counties have agreed to come along if you allow them too. They are all fluent in English so you dont have to worry about that._

_I hope you take my idea into consideration_

_Arthur Kirkland_

Brilliant. Now to send it off.

2 days later Britain got a return email.

_Arthur Kirkland_

_I like your idea and it will go ahead. A date and time will need to be arranged but it shouldnt be a problem._

_Richard Hammond_

This was it. For the first time in forever England was generally excited about something.

**Hope you enjoyed this. If this is popular I will definitley be doing more.**__


	2. Chapter 2

Hers chapter 2. There was more likes than i thought there would be for the first chapter beacuse it sucks. However I am aiming for more reviews so can you please just review anything at all. Thanks.

Be prepared for the randomness.

Chapter 2

England was starting to doubt his decision. At the time he thought it would be brilliant but now. Not so much.

The 20 countries were all sitting in a bus and were being taken to the course. Only a few knew what Total Wipeout was so some were going to be shocked.

"We're here." Englan announced before ushering everyone out of the bus. They were all given life jackets and were ordered to wait. When they were needed they would be called. They were going to go out according to country. So Austria would be first and the U.S.A last.

Austria POV

Austria was called out first and he would be lying if he said he wasnt nervous.

Amanda Byram was doing the commentary as usual. "So, do you know what to expect?" She asked. It wasnt hard to tell that she was excited. Austria told the truth. "I have no idea. I have never seen or heard of total wipeout before. Arthur came up to me and said I should do it and I have nothing better to do."

Amander nodded like this was normal. "Ok then. This is Roderich Edelstein from Austria."

Austria soon learned that they used silly nicknames for the contestants. Thankfully they wernt that bad this time. His was just Roderich 'Austria'.

On that note Ausitria was put foward to the obstacle course. He nearly blacked out. He had not been expecting something so elaborate and difficult. And with that thought he was off. He ran down the slope and tried to jump the small distance onto the catwalk. However this was Austria so he failed. Within 10 seconds of starting he was soaking. Oh well.

He climbed back up and slowly advanced. He got past obstacle one without falling again. However next was sucker punch. Austria refused to get dirty so he procedded with great caution. He got past the wall without falling off. He then procedded to the red balls.

He jumped onto the first one and landed just how he wanted. He bounced to the second one. then the third. And fell. He cursed as he plunged into the water. He managed to climb up quickly though and went onto the cradles of doom.

Once again he went with great caution. First cradle, stop. Second cradle, stop. Final leap and. He fell again.

By the time he got up to the finish it was 4.55. He didnt care. He was done. Thats all that mattered.

Next was Canada. He got through with a good time of 3.45. He didnt make a big show of it. He just tried to get through ASAP.

China did good too. He did fall once or twice but he got through with a good time of 3.30.

Denmark made more of a show. He got really angry whenever he fell, whcih halted his progress. However he still got through with a 4.12 which was better than Austria.

Prussia just kept saying I am awesome which made him lose his concentration. If he fell, he would shout that is so unawesome. However he got 4.00 which was better than Denmark and Austria so he was happy.

Estonia dropped his glasses halfway through. This halted him for 2 whole minutes. In the end he got 6.43, but he didnt care. He just wanted to put that he competed on his blog.

Finland just took his time and was very laid back about it. He got 7.12 but he was so optimistic about finishing that he kept smiling anyway.

France fell in the mud. He cried because it ruined his hair. He gave up which led to disqualification. Poor France.

Hungary stared off fine. However she fell at one point. Prussia shouted loser which caused Hungary to chase him with her frying pan. She was also disqualified.

Iceland went without complaining. He got a good time of 3.25 and instantly grabbed the highest score.

Italy didnt do that bad. He just ran the whole way. It was Germany that helped. He said, imagine Britain chasing you, which Italy did. However he fell a couple of times. His score was 4.20 which was still better than Austria.

Japan zipped through quichly as though he was made for it. He only fell off the big red balls which everyone had failed at so far. This got him a score of 2.55. He was happy to get the highest score.

Lithuania just kept looking over his shoulder. No one knew why but it disturbed his concentration. He got a time of 6.20.

Norway fell loads. No one was sure why. Maybe he just couldnt be asked. He got a score of 6.13 either way.

Poland saw the course and ran away. He cried and moaned that he didnt want to do it. Instant disqualification.

Russia got through just fine. It was terrifying. It looked like it took no effort. However he still failed on the Big Red Balls. His time was 2.56.

Sweden found it easy too. He just went through it looking calm. He was the first passed th big red balls. However he went slowly which gave him a score of 3 minuets exactly.

Germany was awesome. He didnt fail or fall once. He zipped through without a problem at all. He went over the big red balls like they were barely a problem. He was awesome and got a time of 1.25. He took top place instantly.

Englands was fine. He went through quickly. He fell on the balls though which sucked. His time was 2.56.

America ran through saying i'm the hero. He didnt do that bad except for falling off the balls and cradles. His time was 3.45.

So. In the end going through was Canada, China, Denmark, Prussia, Iceland, Italy, Japan, Russia, Sweden, Germany, UK, USA.

They were all excited and prepped for stage 2. The sweeper.

Please review. Thanks.


	3. Chapter 3

Hers ir is. Chapter 3. Hold on to you horses. This is going to be wild.

Chapter 3

Somehow this didnt feel right. the 12 nations that got through were all standing on very high podiums. And that contraption in the middle didnt look good. Italy looked like he was preparing to get out a white flag and start waving it about.

Suddenly the commantators voice was heard. "This is the sweeper. The contestants have to jump over the moving arms and remain on the podium. the last 6 people will go through to the next round. The 6 who fall off first will be out of the games."

So, no pressure. And just like that the sweeper started moving.

By the way. the order around is Germany, Japan, Russia, England,Sweden, Iceland, China, Canada, America, Prussia, Denmark, Italy. I thought you oughta know.

So germany jumped and cleared it easily. So did Japan and Russia. It went around twice. Suddenly, it caught Italys foot and he went flying. "Doitsu, doitsu." He cried before hitting the water. He swam to the edge, brought out a white flag and started waving it.

For a while nothing else happened. the arm got steadily higher when. It took Denmark off guard. he jumped and hit the floor wrong. He toppled right off and landed face first in the drink. "Godammit. Why does life hate me? Whos fault was this? i hate you."

Prussia was laughing so hard, he thought his sides were going to split. the face Denmark made when he was going down. So awesome. However this meant that Prussia didnt see the arm coming back around. It hit him right in the stomach. For a moment Prussia tried to grab onto the arm and stay there. However it didnt work and he went plummeting into the water. "You are so unawesome. that should not have happened. It was your fault west." He swam over to the edge and slapped Denmark who was laughing at him.

Thankfully they were pulled apart by Hungary and Austria before it could develop into a real fight.

For about 5 minutes nothing happened. The arm got higher. The countries kept jumping. Tension was thick in the air. Suddenly Iceland jumped. However he was too early. He came down right on top of the arm and fell right off. He sighed before swimming over to the edge. Norway came over to him and whispered in his ear "Big brother." Iceland just sighed again. It was going to be a long day.

Now the tensin was really building. Only 2 more people now. Then the rest f them were safe. Germany started looking at everyone else. He hoped more than anything that it would be Sweden and Russia that fell off. If he was honest, he really didnt want to face the both of them in the last round.

There was a slight squeal. Germany was paying too much attention to his thoughts and not what was going on around him. He saw somebody go under but he didnt know who. Ger many looked around. Who was missing? China. China was gone now. Well, it could have been worst.

Just one more now. One more. Then it happened. The arm was rather high by now. Sweden jumped but it wasnt high enough. The arm caught his foot and he went somersaulting through the air before hw hit the water. He swam to the edge and looked at the sweeper. He was giving his greatest Swedish death glare ever. Who knew that he was a sore loser.

These games were bringing out the surprising side in people. German half expected for Belarus to come running in and declare that she wanted to marry Lithuania. Or possibly the thought ran through his head that maybe Canada or America may win. Who knew. This day was turning out very weird.

And thats it folks. lets wrap it up for today. Please review.


	4. Chapter 4

Here it is. Chapter 4. I will be useing the door dreadmill for this one. heres a link to watch an episode of total wipeout with the dreadmill with doors.

watch?v=7zxWehmI434

Please enjoy.

Chapter 4

"So, who do you think you will be partenered up with?" England asked. He was speaking to America and Canada because Russia creeped him out and Germany was already talking with Japan. "I dunno dude but if its you I will totally beat you." Good old America. Always being so obnoxsious. "I hate you." England mumbled. He spoke up now. "What about you Matthew. Who do you think you will be with?" Canada looked shocked that England had even realised he was there. "I am not sure. As long as it isnt Germany or Russia, I think I stand a chance of getting through."

Just then Amanda walked in and asked for everyones attention. "Right these are you pairs. Alfred Jones. You are with Matthew Williams." The two brothers stared at each other. They were not expecting that. "Ludwig Beilschmidt and Ivan Braginski." The two just stared at each other. Now was the time to prove who was best. Only Germany could have stayed staring at Russia for such a length of time without cringing or looking away.

That left. "Arthur Kirkland and Kiku Honda." With that she turned and walked out. The countries were left in utter silence. This was just the semi final. There was still a long way to go yet. Then the first two were called out. No one was aloud to know who had got through until the last person had got through.

It didnt take long for the first pair to finish. America was a little over eager. he had started to run but went to fast. He faceplanted epically before getting whizzed off into the water. As he fell he gave out a rather girly squeal. Canada carried on for a while. he had just got past door two when he tripped. However he had already won so it didnt matter. Canada was going through baby.

Germany and Russia went next. Both had looks of determination on there faces. It was so close. They had both got past door one. Then door two. All that was needed was for them to get past door three and onto the platform and it would have been over. Russia was in the lead. Germany could tell that he was going to lose. When Russia tripped. He wnet right back to the start and fell off with a splash. Germany managed to get onto the platform. He was grinning hugely andeven went over to hug Italy who hugged him right back. He had beaten Russia. You cant say that it wasnt a big achievement.

Japan and Engalnd were even more eagerly anticipated. Whoever won this would be the final one to the final. It was over quickly. They both started off just fine but Japan slipped. He must have landed on his foot badly. Either way he went down and was out in no time. England was very surprised. However he wanted to prove himself. He ran right to the end and jumped onto the platform. He grinned slightly and even stuck his tounge out at Japan.

This was it. He had gotten through. Now everyone was excited. they would have to wait a while before they got to see the final round. It was being held at night which meant they had some time for interviews and for the last three to find out about each other. It was very highly anticipated.

**Yay. Canada, Germany and England got through. I would have paid to see America fail on that thing. Please review.**


	5. Chapter 5

This is it. Th finale. So Canada, Germany and Iggy are all in the final. I bet none of you will guess who wins. Except Liv. She already knows cause she looked at my notes. Evil. Wel enjoy.

Chapter 5

Germany would be lying if he didnt say he was nervous. He had seen these last courses before and it looked like mouse trap. He could tell he was going to fall off and become a laughig stock for the next century. He was going secona. England was first and Canada was last. This shoild be easy right.

England

Now he was having second thoughts. He was sitting up here in this ring feeling like the biggest fool in the world. Maybe he should have let Japan win. then the buzzer went off and he slid down the extremely dangerous waer slide. He hit the water but managed to stay on the ring. He slipped off and got on to the barrel run. He zipped up as fast as he could but lost his footing and went down. He cussed himself before expertely running up rthe rest of the slope and onto the next obstacle.

This couldnt be that had got past the punch wall with no problems so the balance beam would be easy. He was over in about 5 seconds and was moving onto obstacle 3. This was what he was dreading. The crazy sweeper. he chose his time and quickly ran fowards. However he misjudjed his momentum and went down like a sack of potatoes. He blushed brigh red as he climbed back up but he didnt think anyone noticed. The second attempt was better and he got through fine.

Obstacle 4 was terrifying. He had to swing on a rope to get to a different podium. he took his time preparing but he got through on the first time. Just 1 more jump and... finished.

He swam over to the edge and nearly collapsed to the floor but he knew that would be undignified so he kept himself up. However at that momant something barreled right into him screamming "IGGY." Both England and America toppled right into the water with a loud splash.

Engalnd resurfaced and quickly scrammbled back onto the bank. he then helped pull up a very sodden but grinning America. "Idiot, go sit back down." England scolded and America just winked before doing as he was told.

Engalnd was told that he got a score of 3.31 and that he would have to wait for the next person to see if he was going to be third or perhaps second battling for first. However Grmany was next so who knows.

Germany got off to a great start. He managed to get up the barrel run like it was not even a hinderance. He cleared the balance beam in no time. However the crazy sweepr was his downfall. He was so close to the end when he got knocked off. There was a surprising look of error and fustartion on his face as he fell which was comical. He managed to do it the second time though. The rope swing was easy for Germany. He swung like Tarzan and got nto the podium. One last jump and he was finished.

He swam to the bank and stood next to England. The two were expressionless as Amanda annonced the results. "Arthur. You were brilliant but I am afraid you didnt beat Ludwigs time of 1.47. I am afraid you will have to go and join you teammates now." England ust nodded before shaking Germanys hand and leaving to dry himself off and get changed.

Last was Canada. No one was expecting much from him, he knew that much. he had even overheard some people betting that he would come in third place. It kind of stung and he was getting prepared to prove them wrong. The horn sounded and he was off.

The barrel run was intimidating but like England and Germany he got through with no problem. He got past the balance beam easily too. When he got to the crazy sweeper he found that his short frame and slight build were a great help. He got past on his first try. His light weight also made the rope swing simple. He jumped and was finished.

Now was the moment of truth. Canada and Germany stood side by side. Then Amanda annonced the result. "The winner is. Matthew with an amazing time of 1.10." For a moment silence. Then Matthew let out a whoop of joy. "Yes. Beat that losers. And you all thought i would lose. Suckers."

However this caused something very unexpected. the counries started muttering.

"Who is that guy."

"Isnt it Americas little brother."

"No, he looks younger than America."

"its Canadia right."

Obviously this victory didnt mean anything changed. Hang in there Canada.

**Bet you werent expecting that. Please review.**


End file.
